Separation and divorce can be daunting, especially when children are involved. As a parent, you want to emotionally support your kids while navigating the legal complexities of divorce and custody arrangements. To help you through this challenging time, we’ve gathered some common questions from local Charlotte parents and provided detailed answers. 

If you’re facing a separation or custody issue in North Carolina, the family law team at SeiferFlatow is here to assist you.

Question: I am about to separate. How do I discuss this with my kids?

Discussing separation with your children can be one of the most challenging conversations you’ll ever have. It’s important to approach the discussion with honesty, sensitivity, and reassurance. Here are some tips to guide you:

• Choose the Right Time and Place: Find a calm and quiet environment where you can talk without interruptions. Make sure both parents are present if possible.
• Be Honest, But Age-Appropriate: Explain the situation truthfully but in a way that your children can understand based on their age and maturity level.
• Reassure Them: Emphasize that the separation is not their fault and that both parents still love them and will continue to be involved in their lives.
• Encourage Questions: Allow your children to express their feelings and ask questions. Answer them honestly and reassure them that it’s okay to feel sad or confused.
• Consistency and Stability: Provide as much consistency and stability as possible during this transition. Maintain regular routines to help your children feel secure.

Considering separation? Here are some basic first steps.

Question: If I file now, how long until custody is heard by the court?

In North Carolina, the timeline for a custody case can range from 90 days to 18 months depending on several factors, including the complexity of the case, the court’s schedule, and whether the parents can reach an agreement outside of court. Here is a general overview of the process:

• Filing the Complaint: Once you file a custody complaint, the other parent must be served with the paperwork.
• Temporary Orders: If necessary, you can request a temporary custody order to establish a temporary arrangement while the case is pending. In most counties, temporary custody hearings are scheduled within 45 days of filing a complaint.
• Mediation: North Carolina requires parents in high-conflict custody cases to attend mediation to try to resolve custody disputes before going to trial.
• Court Hearing: If mediation is unsuccessful, the case will proceed to a court hearing. The time frame for this can vary, but it may take several months from the date of filing.

Because each case is unique, it’s important to consult with a family law attorney to understand the specific timeline for your case and to ensure that your rights are protected throughout the process.

Question: Are virtual parenting coaches a thing?

Yes, virtual parenting coaches are a real and increasingly popular resource for parents navigating separation, divorce, and custody issues. 

Virtual parenting coaches offer guidance and support through online platforms, making it convenient for parents to access help from the comfort of their homes. Here are some benefits of virtual parenting coaching:

• Accessibility: Virtual sessions can be scheduled at times that are convenient for you, without the need for travel.
• Personalized Support: Coaches provide personalized strategies and advice tailored to your specific situation and parenting challenges.
• Confidentiality: Online sessions offer a private and confidential space to discuss sensitive issues.
• Flexibility: Virtual coaching can be more flexible in terms of scheduling and frequency of sessions.

Virtual parenting coaches can help you develop effective co-parenting strategies, improve communication with your ex-partner, and support your children’s emotional well-being during this transition.

Question: How can I give my ex access to our kid’s MyChart/MyAtrium without giving them access to mine?

To give your co-parent access to your child’s MyChart or MyAtrium account without sharing your personal information, follow these steps:

• Create a Separate Account: Most healthcare systems, including Atrium Health, allow parents to create separate proxy accounts for their children. You can set up a MyChart account specifically for your child and grant your ex-partner access to this account.
• Contact Customer Support: If you’re unsure how to set up a proxy account, contact the healthcare provider’s customer support for assistance. They can guide you through the process and ensure that your child’s medical information is accessible to both parents without compromising your privacy.
• Manage Permissions: In the account settings, you can manage permissions and specify what information your ex-partner can view and access.

By setting up a separate account, you can ensure that both parents have access to important medical information while maintaining the privacy of your own healthcare details.

SeiferFlatow is Here for You

Navigating separation and custody issues can be overwhelming, but you don’t have to do it alone. If you have questions or need legal assistance, the family law team at SeiferFlatow is here to help. Contact SeiferFlatow today to schedule a consultation and protect your rights and children’s best interests.